The Negligence of Parents
I was reading a book and it referenced a quote by Mary Wollstonecraft. It reads in relevant part, "A great proportion of the misery that wanders, in hideous forms, around the world, is allowed to rise from the negligence of parents."
What do you think of this quote? I tend to agree with it. I look at people nowadays: no morality, no sense of direction, no appreciation for anything not portrayed in the videos or on TV as glamorous. In this age of "I Want A Famous Face," "MTV Cribs," and "The Bachelorette," is it the negligence of parents that have gotten us this way?
It kind of reminded me of a question that came up at dinner the other day. My boyfriend's aunt asked "What's wrong with kids today?" in reference to why so many kids have a difficult time even getting through the 6th grade without the help of Prozac, Riddlin, Adderol and a whole host of other drugs. My boyfriend's mother and I automatically and adamantly blamed the "negligence of parents." As a parent, you have a duty to make sure that your kid is properly fed, clothed, and prepared to get through the school day without the help of drugs. What is so hard about that? It was done in the 50s, 40s, and generations before that. So, what's the deal now? Negligent parenting was the exception then, today is seems the norm. And the cure for the now-common crime of careless parenting is Prozac ... for the kids.
I hope that when I have children I will be able to make them the center of my world. You must love, care for and nurture your children; make them feel like they're the center of your very stable universe. Otherwise, it just invites all the "misery" that Ms. Wollstonecraft wrote about. Thoughts?
What do you think of this quote? I tend to agree with it. I look at people nowadays: no morality, no sense of direction, no appreciation for anything not portrayed in the videos or on TV as glamorous. In this age of "I Want A Famous Face," "MTV Cribs," and "The Bachelorette," is it the negligence of parents that have gotten us this way?
It kind of reminded me of a question that came up at dinner the other day. My boyfriend's aunt asked "What's wrong with kids today?" in reference to why so many kids have a difficult time even getting through the 6th grade without the help of Prozac, Riddlin, Adderol and a whole host of other drugs. My boyfriend's mother and I automatically and adamantly blamed the "negligence of parents." As a parent, you have a duty to make sure that your kid is properly fed, clothed, and prepared to get through the school day without the help of drugs. What is so hard about that? It was done in the 50s, 40s, and generations before that. So, what's the deal now? Negligent parenting was the exception then, today is seems the norm. And the cure for the now-common crime of careless parenting is Prozac ... for the kids.
I hope that when I have children I will be able to make them the center of my world. You must love, care for and nurture your children; make them feel like they're the center of your very stable universe. Otherwise, it just invites all the "misery" that Ms. Wollstonecraft wrote about. Thoughts?
posted by ~Black American Princess~ @ 10:28 AM
6 Comments:
At Tue Aug 29, 09:41:00 AM,
Elle* said…
I understand where you coming from; Television raises children now! And the fact that what we put into our bodies; our children's bodies as well is appalling! There is even a study that shows if you take children who have ADHD off of processed food and onto Whole Food, their ADHD goes away in a couple of weeks! It's the world we live in....
At Tue Aug 29, 11:14:00 AM,
Shakti said…
I agree with you 100% that children should not be on prescription meds. But in defense of parents out there, its just not as easy raising kids in this world. We are living in a world where there are advertisements in newspapers, tv commercials, magazines, billboards, for drug medicines. We have doctors getting kickbacks from drug companies for recommending their product. All the while, incomes have gone down, many cannot survive off one income and children are not really being taught any real education in public school. America's future is their children, but how can children reap from anything without stability (as you noted?). In Germany the government PAYS YOU to have children for the rest of your life (monthly). Over here you might get 100 knocked off your taxes, if you are lucky.
Sorry, this got much longer than I intended. I guess since I am a parent, and I admit to being one of those parents that never wanted to let my child watch TV, and he is now, I need to defend the reasoning behind it. In the future when he goes to school, school will of course come first.. but right now, when putting on Barney means I can brush my teeth and grab breakfast, I opt for my big purple dinosaur.
It's easy to blame parents for everything wrong with kids today, but I firmly believe in the 'it takes a village' mentality, which is much more common in other non westernized societies (where there is better family appreciation and respect for elders.) Sure you can teach all that to your kids, but its easy to become jaded when you are a child and you know you are more mature than your teachers or other adults (which I felt often.) Ok, Sorry this got long!
At Wed Aug 30, 12:17:00 PM,
Sarah said…
I have mixed feelings about this.
I believe that most children do not belong on prescription medications for behavoral problems. But unless you've actually been there, you can't say that is true for every child out there. My cousin's son was on prescription medication for a few years, though he is no longer, but it was a necessary evil. It helped him focus on school and learn how to behave. And when the time came, he was weaned from the medication and able to function like the rest of us.
So while I truly believe that most children can be helped with proper diet (Elle cited a study I am familiar with and found supported my belief that processed foods don't belong in our children's bodies), I also know that some children -even with a good diet- need that extra help so that they don't fall behind and so that they can learn.
As a parent, I have strong beliefs on child rearing. I agree that parental negligence does contribute greatly to a lot of the issues people develop - too much television, poor diets, inadequete supervision, and generally not enough social development at home. The kind of neglience that manifests in criminal behavior, acting out, etc, goes beyond the run of the mill - it's full time parents who act like absentees, parents who ignore their kids, parents who treat fast food joints like their personal kitchens...
We cannot blame everything on parents though. Even children have free will.
Like Angel, I had great intentions of a perfect whole foods diet and no television for my children, lots of fresh air and book reading - everything just so. But life doesn't work like that. I still do my best to give my son the best of everything, and I do stick to the whole foods thing as much as possible. I limit the television. We read as much as possible and go outside at least once a day. But there is so much else that happens on a daily basis, and sometimes you get a curveball. I admit, sometimes I need 15 mins of uninterrupted time and Will gets to watch Baby Einstein for awhile. And sometimes when we are on the go all day, I have to give in to the fast food ease to get my son fed when he's hungry.
No parent is perfect. That's an important thing to remember.
At Wed Aug 30, 02:15:00 PM,
~Black American Princess~ said…
I agree with all comments thus far. Sarah is absolutely right; I should have qualified my rant. Some children legitimately do have problems. That said, I don't deny a parent from seeking meds if necessary, or letting them watch TV, or giving them the occasional Happy Meal as a treat. I guess my concern is with the lack of parenting that accompanies all that. If your kids on meds, and they think french fries are a vegetable, and they watch a disproportionate amount of TV … of course they're going to unhealthy and lack concentration. I am not a parent yet and can't even begin to imagine how I'd get through that Herculean task. So maybe I should shut up in this area. I just worry about these kids today, that's all .. Let me add, that from what I witness from shakti (and the character that I know of Sarah), I think you guys are wonderful parents, certainly not negligent in any respect!!
At Sat Sep 23, 05:40:00 AM,
Patti V. said…
OK, can an "experienced" mom of 2 teens weigh in here?
Back in the "early 90s," or Stone Age, I was in your shoes.
No TV, just Disney videos, no sugar,no soda just 100 percent juice, no junk food like chips, that was my ideal mothering concept.
Then came little kids' birthday parties, and cake, and cupcakes, and goody bags filled with things like gummy worms and ...
You get the idea. It is impossible to keep your child in a bubble of healthy living. You want them to interact with other kids, and with that comes food and toys you may not have wanted for them.
All you can do is what you think is best, give them lots of love and hope they will turn out alright (they usually do).
OK, the old lady is done :)
At Sun Sep 24, 01:45:00 PM,
CreoleInDC said…
I don't believe in kids taking drugs for attention disorders. No ma'am...no ma'am.
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